Whenever I tell someone I’m lactose intolerant, I remember this funny quote from Chris Rock: “We’ve got so much food in America, we’re even allergic to it…. Do you think anybody in Rwanda is lactose intolerant?”

Obviously, lactose intolerance and food allergies do indeed exist. But I certainly often forget to be grateful for the wealth of options I still have. From organic probiotic soy yogurt to gluten-free “live” sprouted bread to raw kale chips, my local co-op’s got it all — and I’m pretty much free to buy and eat what I like.

Considering what’s going on in Haiti, and more locally, the fact that nearly 10% of L.A. county residents need food assistance (via LAist), I’m incredibly lucky — which doesn’t actually keep me from bitching and moaning about the organic ketchup sold in plastic bottles, the ridiculously high price of organic raw almond butter ($16 a jar? Seriously?), the inconsiderate fellow co-op member who always ties up her bike on the handicapped parking sign in front of the store, thereby blocking the doorway for anyone in a wheelchair — not to mention making me squish to get past the damn bike! OMG!

That’s why SFGate columnist Mark Morford’s latest piece — “Why are you so terribly disappointing?” made me LOL — and think (via kottke). If you’ve been pissed off and raving mad about all that’s wrong with the environment and the world as you see it, you’ve got to take a break from the anger and read his funny column, which pokes fun at the constant complaining we Americans tend to do:

Global warming? Total effing letdown. Americans are no longer believing in it. Do you know why? Not because the mountains of scientific proof aren’t there. Not because it’s not happening. But because it’s not yet happening to us like they said it would in the movies and those worst-case scenario books. Where are the zombies? The ice forests? Where’s the tidal wave crashing over the Himalayas? I want my goddamn apocalypse, and I want it now….

My God, did you hear that pathetic State of the Union? That guy, that President Obama? Disappointing times a thousand, am I right? What the hell happened to him? Why is he so weak and ineffectual? Why the hell can’t he step up and fix the entire planet in under 400 days like he promised he would, in my dreams and fantasies and impossible liberal grass-fed organic tofu greengasms? Doesn’t he know I put a goddamn bumper sticker on my Subaru for him? I’ve never done that for anyone. Bastard.

All this is to say — Maybe we can share what makes us happy or hopeful about the environment and environmental concerns today. I shared three things that make me optimistic about 2010 — so now it’s your turn to share in the comments!

Before you spout off about why I’m an idiot for feeling hopeful about something so banal and small as a sign encouraging people to bring their own bags, pay heed to what Mark says about comment sections on blogs:

The anonymous comments section of any major media site or popular blog will be so crammed with bile and bickering, accusation and pule, hatred and sneer you can’t help but feel violently disappointed by the shocking lack of basic human kindness and respect, much less a sense of positivism or perspective.

Actually the commenters on this blog are generally awesome; it’s just the commenters on the other blogs I write for that make me bitch and moan. Anyway — let the positive commenting begin –

Photo by gaminrey

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>> Get to a TweetsGiving. Raise money for a solar-energy-powered school in Tanzania while meeting dogooders in your town. Angelenos will be drinking for a cause in downtown LA on Tues., Nov. 24 — and tickets start at just $5. See you there!

>> Drop your pants. That is, if those pants will fit men. The 2nd annual Thanksgiving Mens Pants Drive is collecting men’s pants to distribute on Thanksgiving Day at the Santa Monica Civic Center. About 3800 pants are needed — so drop off your donations by Wednesday before Thanksgiving at the Civic Center. Call 310.394.3153 for more details.

>> Give organic. The LA Regional Foodbank and local Whole Foods stores have teamed up for a fresh produce drive. If you’re not a fan of those canned food drives — because you’re not a fan of unfresh, non-organic food in BPA-tainted containers — then here’s your chance to put your money behind what you preach. Just stop by a local Whole Foods this month and buy a voucher to donate fresh produce. Lindsay William-Ross at LAist writes that the LA Regional Foodbank + Whole Foods organic food drive is “the perfect thing for Thanksgiving.”

>> Opt for a fair trade and local Thanksgiving centerpiece. Pretty up your dinner table with an arrangement from flourLA, a local company that’ll make you a floral Thanksgiving centerpiece using fair trade flowers. Mention green LA girl for 25% off of any arrangement plus free delivery.

And keep these general tips in mind for a green Thanksgiving

>> A green Thanksgiving for procrastinators. Get the deets on local farmers to bug for your heirloom turkey — or a now-old post about buying conventional vs. organic ingredients for your Thanksgiving dinner.

>> Planning on a meat-free Thanksgiving? Lou Bendrick’s put together “A tasting of four meatless “turkeys” for the holiday table” at Grist. Of course, Co-opportunity offers both greenly, humanely-raised turkeys and vegan fare for Thanksgiving too.

>> Green up your Thanksgiving by saying “No to Fake Plastic Wishbones & Other Thanksgiving Waste,” as fellow Blogher contributing editor Beth Terry recommends. Earlier: Thanksgiving and the vegetarian.

Image via TweetsGiving

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Today marks not only Halloween, but also the last day of Fair Trade Month. Thus, here are 3 tasty coffees that are not only all triple certified — but have an additional little story to make you feel good about what you’re drinking while jolting you awake  too.

Arbor Day Specialty Coffee. Here’s a coffee literal treehuggers will adore. Yes, it’s organic certified, fair trade certified, and Smithsonian Bird-Friendly certified — but the eco-goodness doesn’t stop there. The proceeds from this coffee go directly to the Arbor Day Foundation’s Rain Forest Rescue Program to preserve rain forests.

In fact, according to the foundation, a single cup of this coffee will preserve more than two square feet of rainforest! The coffee’s grown by the ISMAM Co-op in Tapachula, Chiapas in Mexico. Take the online tour to see how the coffee gets from the sustainable forest to your cup.

Eco-altruism tastes good too. Coffee Review gave the Arbor Day Blend a 92 rating — and having tried the yummy coffee myself, I’m seriously considering buying a membership to Coffee Club. That would get me a 10-ounce bag plus an Arbor Day mug for $6.95 — with two more bags sent every four weeks  at $8.95 per bag. You can also just buy a single 10-ounce bag for $8.95 if you want to try out the coffee for yourself — or commit to the 5-pound bulk bag if you’d like to reduce packaging and shipping costs.

Little Feet Coffee. Athletes and sports fans — This coffee’s for you. If you’ve got fond memories of playing in Little League or other kid sports teams, here’s your chance to give a little kid with fewer privileges a taste of the fun opportunities you got. Buy your morning brew from Little Feet Coffee Company, and you’ll be helping to deliver soccer balls to underprivileged kids around the world.

The tasty coffee — which Coffee Review rated an 88 — is also impeccably eco-ethical, since it’s shade-grown by the Las Capucas Cooperative in Honduras and organic, fair trade, and Rainforest Alliance-certified. But it’s the soccer story that’s really heartwarming. Yes, there is a girls’ team!

I discovered Little Feed Coffee at Whole Foods, where a 12-ounce bag (also available online) costs $12. Right now, you can also get a bag of coffee with a soccer ball for $30. A monthly subscription program’s also available, though it doesn’t really save you money (12 ounces of coffee for $13.95 every  month including shipping).

Caffe Ibis’ Cafe Femenino. Feminists who want to help underprivileged women succeed economically should brew this coffee as their morning pick me up. The Cafe Femenino Coffee Project’s “a social program for women coffee producers in rural communities around the world,” giving women economic power in what tends to be a male-dominated profession in male-centric places.

Cafe Femenino coffee’s actually roasted and sold by a number of eco-ethical companies — but Caffe Ibis, whose founder I met a few years ago, adds a triple-certified element to the mix. As you can tell by the name of the company, Caffee Ibis is all about birds — and offers a whole list of triple certified coffees — organic, fair trade, and Smithsonian Bird Friendly certified — to prove its feather-friendly commitment.

Caffe Ibis’ Cafe Femenino coffee’s grown by woman-owned and operated farms in Peru. Get it online at $9.99 for a 12-ounce bag — or in bulk at Co-opportunity for less.

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Confused as to what all these certifications mean? Here’s a quick guide:

>> Organic certification, whose guidelines in the U.S. are set by the USDA, basically ensures that dangerous pesticides weren’t used in growing the coffee. Yes, there are many legitimate controversies about whether or not these standards are tough enough.

>> Fair Trade certification for coffee, provided in the U.S. by nonprofit TransFair USA, ensures that the coffee’s grown by cooperative farms that receive a more economically sustainable price for their coffee and a social premium to invest in farmers’ communities. Again, yes, there are many legitimate controversies about whether or not these standards are high enough. Some activists are pushing for higher minimum fair trade coffee prices, others for more co-op centric standards (tea producers, for ex, don’t have to be organized into co-ops).

>> Smithsonian Bird Friendly certification ensures that the coffee’s not only organic but also shade-grown — with the money from certification fees going towards funding bird research. Word on the street is that this is one of the most expensive certification seals to get — though also one of the most rewarding for bird and rain forest lovers.

>> Rainforest Alliance Certification provides some environmental guarantees — but tends to be controversial as it makes vague economic and environmental promises without actually guaranteeing price premiums for farmers. While Rainforest Alliance certification helps some companies make greener steps, the certification program is often criticized for helping greenwash some of the biggest, most abusive corporations (Chiquita, Dole, Kraft) that refuse to commit to more stringent standards demanded by other certifications.

Earlier:

>> 6-step program for the caffeine-addicted

>> Shade grown backgrounder

Images via Arbor Day Foundation, Little Feet, and Caffe Ibis

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The turnout at Blogger Beach Cleanup was even better than we’d hoped for! 112 people signed in — and a dozen or so more people participated without formally signing in — to pick up 39.5 pounds of trash from Santa Monica Beach!

Thanks to everyone who came out. As you know, we had a bunch of prizes donated from local green businesses and eco-nonprofits. Here are the lucky prize winners from Blogger Beach Cleanup!

Top blog recruiters:

1st place: Green Guys Media — a $50 gift certificate from SEED Restaurant

2nd place: CHICK Blog — a $50 gift certificate from The Green Life

3rd place: The Reach Magazine TV blog — a $50 gift certificate from SEED Restaurant

4th place: Take a Swig of Alf– a $50 gift certificate from SEED Restaurant

Top trash collectors:

1st place: Matt Geller, Green Guys Media — a $50 gift certificate from Co-opportunity

2nd place: Darren Moore, Ecovations — a FilterForGood prize pack

3rd place: Jen Bravo and Damien Somerset, Shift Logic — a Greenpeace prize pack,

Car-free volunteer drawing:

Cara Finken — a Clif Bar Prize Pack from Clif Bar

Nonprofit with the best web goal:

Sustainable Works — Web and social media goal-setting and goal implementation with the help of Net2LA.

Thanks to everyone for coming out to Blogger Beach Cleanup. Remember to sign up with the nonprofits who were at the event — AND at 350.org — to stay on top of climate change legislation and treaties — and our collective futures! — as we get closer to the Copenhagen Climate Talks in December, when the new Kyoto Protocol of sorts will be drawn up.

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Local blogs let you see your city through  your neighbors eyes — and get in on the great deals about town that they’ve discovered for you. And at Blogger Beach Cleanup, you’ll see Zach from LAist and Caroline on Crack — plus these L.A.-centric blogs that’ll clue you in on where you can get the latest freebies, deals, and good eats:

>> Yolanda Evans will join the cleanup representing the popular foodie blog Eater LA, which covers the restaurant, nightlife and bar scene in this metropolis.

>> Troy Corley and Ron O’Brien at Free L.A. have an ongoing blog highlighting freebies around the city — in addition to their print budget travel guide, Free L.A.: The Ultimate Free Fun Guide to the City of Angels.

>> Those who went to Blogger Prom will recognize H.C. of L.A. and O.C. Foodventures — He’s the guy that signed you in! H.C. writes about his yummy food adventures all over SoCal.

So sign up for the Blogger Beach Cleanup! There’ll be free Clif Bars and free yerba mate drinks, free reusable bottles and totes for the first 70 volunteers to arrive, lots and lots of prizes, and a yummy happy hour at Pourtal.

Logos via Eater LA and Free LA

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Fans of plastic-free-living blog Fake Plastic Fish will get a special treat tomorrow! Beth Terry of Fake Plastic Fish flew down from Oakland last night to visit L.A. for the Plastic Pollution Coalition’s Is Plastic Washed Up? film series tonight — and tomorrow, she’ll be joining the Blogger Beach Cleanup!

Beth’s the woman behind the Take Back the Filter campaign — which helped convince Brita to start recycling its filters through a collaboration with Whole Foods and Preserve! She also keeps a weekly tally — with photos! — of her plastic consumption, throws down “Show Us Your (Plastic) Trash!” challenges, and makes her own fair trade, organic chocolate syrup at home.

Many other local eco-bloggers will be at Blogger Beach Cleanup too. A couple more you can look forward to meeting:

>> Evan Kopelson’s Green Media News covers “climate change, sustainable business, corporate social responsibility (CSR), and personal responsibility.” Evan’s also in the process of getting rid of almost all his belongings as part of his personal uber-eco challenge.

>> Joe Magee’s PineMark is a brand new company that offers a green lifestyle certification for individuals.

So sign up for the Blogger Beach Cleanup! There’ll be free Clif Bars to snack on — as well as free drinks from Guayaki. Plus, we’ve got free reusable bottles and totes for the first 70 volunteers to arrive, lots and lots of prizes, and a yummy happy hour at Pourtal.

Photos by Siel; PineMark logo via PineMark

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We’ve put together eco-friendly travel directions to get to the Blogger Beach Cleanup — and are even offering up a Clif Bar Prize Pack for one lucky volunteer who gets to the event travel free. But to motivate you even further to consider leaving the car behind, we’re resorting to — peer pressure!

That’s to say that — in addition to the car-free women bloggers I already wrote about — some fun blogging cyclists will be at Blogger Beach Cleanup this Saturday, Oct. 24. A few you can meet at the event to hit up for biking tips:

>> Joe Linton, a.k.a. L.A. Creek Freak, not only bikes all over L.A. but kayaks down the L.A. River too! Joe’s activism made him the perfect interviewee for the L.A. Times’ latest story on the L.A. River Revitalization Plan’s clash with the high speed rail plans. Joe’s also the guy who put together the L.A. Bike Summit; he lives car-free at L.A. Eco-Village.

>> Cosmo’s blog, Los Angeles Cycle Chic, showcases great photos of local cyclists, and photo-illustrated of bikes you can find, test ride, and buy in the L.A.-area. Curious about Linus Bikes? Read Cosmo’s post about them.

>> Alex Thompson of Westside Bikeside! blogs about bike culture on the west side and leads bike rides like the “Bear Cavalry.”

Also, Joe Anthony — a car-free dude — will be biking from the Wilshire/Western Redline station to the Blogger Beach Cleanup on Saturday! So cycle with company by joining him and riding to Santa Monica together. Contact Joe by emailing janthony321@gmail.com or tweeting him @ohaijoe.

And if you end up needing to drive, remember to carpool! And if you haven’t signed up for the Blogger Beach Cleanup yet, do so now! All volunteers will get free Clif Bars to snack on — as well as free drinks from Guayaki. Plus, we’ve got free reusable bottles and totes for the first 70 volunteers to arrive, lots and lots of prizes, and a yummy happy hour at Pourtal.

Photos of Joe and Alex by Siel; middle photo via LACycleChic

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Travel car-free to Blogger Beach Cleanup for a chance to win a Clif Bar Prize Pack!

Walk, bike, or take public transportation to the Blogger Beach Cleanup on Oct. 24, and you’ll be entered into a drawing to win:

>> A Terracycle bag made from upcycled Clif bar wrappers
>> A box of Clif bars
>> An organic cotton Clif T-shirt for men
>> An organic cotton Luna T-shirt for women
>> A Luna cap and pair of socks (these don’t seem to be particularly green)

Sorry, carpoolers will not be entered into the drawing — and walking a few steps from the beach parking lot to the cleanup spot won’t count. So think of this Clif Bar Prize Pack as your motivation to travel green to the event — We’ve already put together eco-friendly travel directions for you!

Clif Bar’s well known for supporting eco-friendly transportation through initiatives like the Clif Bar 2 Mile Challenge. All volunteers will get free Clif Bars to snack on — as well as free drinks from Guayaki. Plus, we’ve got free reusable bottles and totes for the first 70 volunteers to arrive, lots and lots of prizes, and a yummy happy hour at Pourtal.

Sign up for Blogger Beach Cleanup now!

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>> The UCLA School of Public Affairs has put together a half-day conference titled Greening the North American Energy Relationship: Building a Stronger U.S.-Canada Environmental Partnership. The event features the eco-famous David Suzuki as a keynote speaker. RSVP online to there on Thurs., Oct. 22 from 8 am – 1:30 pm at the Covel Commons Grand Horizon Room at UCLA.

>> The L.A. Bicycle Master Plan meeting for the Harbor Area happens Thurs., Oct. 22, 5 pm – 7 pm at Peck Park, 560 N. Western Ave., San Pedro.

>> The Climate Registry’s hosting a Climatini to “educate members of the public about climate change in a fun and engaging manner, and to foster a community of local climate change leaders.” Be there for food and drink specials on Thurs., October 22 at Café Pinot in downtown L.A. The free event will also feature eco-giveaways and raffles.

>> Discuss the Westside Subway Extension stops for the Westside! The stops under discussion will be Wilshire at Bundy, 26th, 16th, and 4th St. Be there on Thurs., Oct. 22 from 6 pm – 8 pm at the Multi-Purpose Room of the Santa Monica Public Library, 601 Santa Monica Blvd., Santa Monica.

>> Author of Now or Never and The Weather Makers Tim Flannery will speak about A Climate Change Call to Action on Friday, Oct. 23, at 6:30 at the Natural History Musuem of Los Angeles, 900 Exposition Blvd., Los Angeles. The free event will be followed by a book signing. RSVPs strongly suggested by contacting kewald@nhm.org or 213.763.3433.

>> UCLA’s Plastic Pollution Coalition invites you to Is Plastic Washed Up?, a film series about plastic pollution, featuring Tapped and other films. This happens Fri., Oct. 23 from 7 pm – 10:30 pm at  James Bridges Theater at UCLA. The FREE event requires an RSVP to plasticpollution@gmail.com.

>> Not to be missed: Blogger Beach Cleanup, planned by me and Sara Bayles of The Daily Ocean happens Sat., Oct. 24 starting at 4 pm. Come early to make sure you’re one of the lucky 70 who get a freebie! You’ll make friends while cleaning the beach! We’ve also got lots and lots of prizes, and a yummy happy hour at Pourtal.

Blogger Beach Cleanup is undoubtedly the most important activity happening on Sat., Oct. 24 — because Sara and I are planning it — but many other cool events are happening that day in celebration of the International Day of Climate Action. And most of them don’t conflict with Blogger Beach Cleanup, so you can hit multiple eco-events to commemorate the day! A few to check out:

>> Academic types will be happy to know that UCLA and Loyola Marymount University have joined forces for a Teach-in and Rally in support of global action on climate change. This event kicks off with a musical performance by Four Way Free, followed by a peaceful demonstration and talks from environmental experts. Then participants will form a massive “350” with their bodies on the lawn of the Federal Building. It all happens from from 10 am – noon at the Los Angeles Federal Building, 11000 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles

>> If you’re near the Manhattan Beach area, stop by the South Bay Los Angeles 350 Climate Action at 3 pm to join “the Amazing Waving Human Tide Line to dramatically showcase where sea level rise will be bringing the ocean waves if climate change scientists’ predictions of sea level rise come true.” A number of eco-organizations, both big and small, will participate in the event.

>> The L.A. Bicycle Master Plan meeting for Central/South Los Angeles happens  Sat., Oct. 24, 10 am – noon at Exposition Park – Dr. Mary McLeod Bethune Regional Library, 3900 S. Western Ave., Los Angeles.

>> The Los Angeles Community Garden Council’s local community gardening conference and showcase dubbed Gathering of Community Gardens happens all day Oct. 24 – 25. According to the website, “Scheduled topics include beekeeping, vegetable gardening, composting and native plants, led by LA Common Ground (the LA County Master Gardeners) and other garden experts. Three workshops will be conducted entirely in Spanish.”

>> Hear Los Angeles Planning Commissioner Michael Woo, who’s also a member of the CARB SB 375 Regional Targets Advisory Committee, talk about the future of development on Mon., Oct. 26 at 2 pm at UCLA School of Public Affairs,  Room 1246, Los Angeles. RSVP required.

>> The L.A. Bicycle Master Plan meeting for San Fernando Valley happens Mon., Oct. 26, 5 pm – 7 pm at Marvin Braude-San Fernando Valley Constituent Services Center, Conference Room 1B, 6262 Van Nuys Blvd, Van Nuys.

>> Discuss the Westside Subway Extension stops for the Mid Wilshire / Miracle Mile areas. The stops under discussion will be Wilshire at Crenshaw, La Brea, and Fairfax. Be there on Mon., Oct. 26 from 6 pm – 8 pm at the Terrace Room, 5th Floor of Los Angeles County Museum of Art, 5905 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles.

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Enjoy yummy Clif and Luna bars at the Blogger Beach Cleanup on Oct. 24!

We’ve got a bar for every type of volunteer — from the Builders protein bar to the organic Spooky S’mores Clif Kid ZBar to the organic Luna Cookies! Clif even threw in some Clif Kid organic twisted fruit, if bars aren’t your style. Many bars have earned the USDA organic seal; all are at least 70% organic.

Thanks to green company Clif’s generosity, volunteers can fuel up with both classic Clif bars and the newest Clif products. And don’t worry — The bar wrappers won’t add to the trash stream! All wrappers will be collected and sent to Terracycle for upcycling into cool new reusable products!

Sign up now to join the Blogger Beach Cleanup! There’ll be free drinks from Guayaki, reusable bottles and totes for the first 70 volunteers to arrive, lots and lots of prizes, and a yummy happy hour at Pourtal.

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