Comments on: Tuesday questions: Mean comments

By: Melissa

Melissa — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 04:24:52 +0000

Just ignore the mean comments. These people who write them have no class, raised in a barn, sociopathic and lack of real intelligence. Name-calling is so immature. Don’t let them bring you down to their level-just say I don’t feed internet trolls.
Melissa´s last blog ..Woman living with the dead bodies of husband and twin sister

By: Siel

Siel — Fri, 22 May 2009 21:25:21 +0000

Thanks everyone for weighing in. So far, main strategies include 1) waiting for either to gain your own perspective or for others to weigh in, 2) having a note atop the comment box that discourages mean comments.

Ideas about actually responding to the comments seem to vary widely, from a private email saying “thanks for yr opinion,” to naming and shaming, dooce-style….

By: maureen

maureen — Fri, 22 May 2009 15:45:45 +0000

Great post, Siel. Mean comments can suck out the fun from blogging. Sometimes my initial reaction includes shock or hurt feelings, so I try to back away from the computer and get some perspective. maureen’s last blog post..hemp dog carrier

By: April

April — Thu, 21 May 2009 12:12:26 +0000

I love how you say “mean comments suck a lot of the fun from blogging” and boy, do I agree. But in my two years of blogging for a major site with a LOT of comments, and some of them quite mean, I can say….WAIT! Don’t respond when the first icy needle of the meanness sinks into your chest. Let all your inner demons moan and cry before you commit any words of reply. Let all the “taking it personally” subside before you decide whether you even want to reply. If the mean comment is precipitated by a mistake you made, honest or otherwise, then I believe you should comment, but not in defense, rather just to acknowledge the person. Most of what we want, I believe, in commenting, is acknowledgment for our perspective, our experiences, and our POV. Always giving commenters that acknowledgment is a good idea, I’ve learned.

By: Condo Blues

Condo Blues — Thu, 21 May 2009 02:59:20 +0000

I have a blurb above my comments box that says that it's OK to disagree with me as long as there's "No hair pulling or name calling." Condo Blues’s last blog post..Race for the Cure Columbus

By: Joe Linton

Joe Linton — Wed, 20 May 2009 22:59:06 +0000

Creek Freak doesn't get 1/100th of the comments that Green LA Girl gets... and nearly no trolls so far. Like many situations in relationships, politics, etc... I try to use non-violent communication... see where I might have empathy with the person's motives/experiences, not just what they've said/written. I think it's good to have a dialog out in the open... let people blow off steam... and, of course, encourage my friends to post sympathetic comments to outweigh the trolls! Joe Linton’s last blog post..Walking Santiago Creek in Santa Ana

By: MJ

MJ — Wed, 20 May 2009 15:24:05 +0000

I've been blogging for 5 years and I've had some mean comments. It's better to deal with them head on, either publicly, like Heather Armstrong/Dooce (who makes hers funny) or privately with a "Thanks for your opinion. MJ’s last blog post..Itty Bitty Entrelac

By: Chris

Chris — Wed, 20 May 2009 14:58:20 +0000

I preempt mean comments by keeping my readership very low :-D Chris’s last blog post..Brad Warner: Atheism and Buddhism

By: Kim Woodbridge

Kim Woodbridge — Wed, 20 May 2009 00:36:52 +0000

Earlier today I was thinking about how to deal with off the wall comments. I got one today and still haven't decided how to respond. I think with mean ones the best thing to do is not respond or to say "Thanks for visiting and sharing your opinion." There isn't too much to say from there. Although the one time I did get a disagreeable/mean person commenting, I didn't handle it very well - I answered too quickly. Kim Woodbridge’s last blog post..5 Most Popular (Anti) Social Posts of All Time

By: Siel

Siel — Tue, 19 May 2009 21:13:43 +0000

Robert — I predict your commenting habits will change as your traffic grows, as you’ll slowly get more & more comments that you’ll begin to feel don’t merit a response :P But I hear what you’re saying, and I can see how in an idealistic world, carefully responding to even the dumbest of comments dashed off by someone just out for attention, could be seen as an opportunity for potentially positive engagement –

Carrick — I do just tend to leave the comments that seem mean — I think that’s actually a good strategy, esp. for bloggers who know they have a tendency to strike back too quickly :)